TIPS 52-56: GRACE OF NATURE, SAYING NO, STAR WARS, TANTRUMS, AND GETTING SICK

MEDITATION PRACTICE FOR MOMS AND DADS, Tip #52: Outside in the forest, and deep in the ocean, is a daily battle of life and death, competition for food and light, exposure to sun, wind, storms, currents, hurricanes, and more. And yet, we seek the forest and the sea for their deep tranquility. We leave our burdened lives to find refuge in these places, and yet on most days, for most of us lucky folks, our burdens do not include struggles for life, death, food, light, or natural disasters. Our struggles are simply for balance and clarity, financial freedom, a fulfilling job, a great family or love life, happiness, etc. So why, in the light of our relative struggles, are the deep wild places our source of refuge and seeking? Because the trees, no matter their circumstances, surrender and give their whole existence to the Universe. The fan corals, waving in the currents, are completely at ease with the flow. We go to them because they are enlightenment, embodied, with no mind to get in the way.

MEDITATION PRACTICE FOR MOMS AND DADS, Tip #53: Say no.  Don't do a lot of extra stuff, or fall  into doership without clarity of purpose and space.  The more I take off my life's plate, the more I appreciate the actual design on the plate itself, which I haven't seen for a good while...

MEDITATION PRACTICE FOR MOMS AND DADS, TIP #54: Want your kids to begin to understand the concepts of prana, aka chi, and the importance of focus, concentration, and intention? Watch "The Empire Strikes Back" with particular emphasis on Luke Skywalker's training with Yoda. Let your child become obsessed with lightsabers and Stormtroopers or whatever it takes to "hook" them--and discuss Yoda's teachings frequently. I remember, at the age of 11, only wanting to be one with the Force. Not much has changed. Yoda is my first Buddha.

MEDITATION PRACTICE FOR MOMS AND DADS, TIP #55: At a recent talk at the Temple of 
 The Universe, spiritual teacher and The Untethered Soul author Mickey Singer likened the tantrums of a young child not getting what he/she wants to the tantrums of the ego when not being fed what it wishes. His techniques, and the technique of meditation, instruct seekers to simply relax and let the ego's tantrum pass and not get engaged with it, just as you would with your child. But we parents get a double whammy when our child has a tantrum in a public place, because often the judgemental or concerned stares of others raises the hackles of your own ego, viz: "This isn't happening to me! They must think I am a horrible parent!" Etc. This is exactly why parenting is an intensive and awesome spiritual practice. It is one of the few life experiences that requires "multitasking" even in your meditation approach, but if you are willing, you can accomplish great feats of awakening by simply viewing these moments, in all of their discomfort, as huge opportunities for letting go, opening and awareness.

MEDITATION PRACTICE FOR MOMS AND DADS, Tip #56: When you get sick, even the most experienced meditators can feel challenged in their ability to be present and peaceful with what "is." Meditation teaches us to "unstick" ourselves from the whirlwind of life, to be present to all that is happening without becoming lost in it. But when parents become sick, it easy to feel as if our whole world is unraveling, since so many others are directly dependent on our well-being. How to maintain a meditation practice and find center? Practice the ancient arts of patience and letting go of your need to be a constant caregiver. Patience in that despite the fact that you feel like ka-ka doing the things that MUST be done, like changing the diapers and feeding your kids, you will eventually feel better. Letting go in that maybe, just maybe, your kids will be okay for a day or five if they have a little more TV or frozen dinners than you would allow in your normal state. And, your kids might just surprise you and benefit from being loosened up a bit from your control. When I was sick recently, my 9-year old learned how to cook and load the dishwasher quite on her own.  With my safety paranoia, had it not been for illness, the poor girl might have had to wait until she was twelve before I allowed her that kind of important personal growth.